everything happens for a reason

everything happens for a reason. i used to hear people say that all the time, but i never really GOT it. then one day when i was looking back over my life, it hit me. if i hadn't been dating that guy in high school, i would never have met my first girlfriend (they were friends), which means i would have never left school and gone back home and met my second girlfriend, which means i would have never been running from the abusive relationship and wound up in new orleans. if i hadn't wound up there, i would never have moved to miami and never met my wifey. all that things i went through led me here and i LOVE it here. (with wifey, i mean, not miami)

it feels like life is spinning out of control lately. when it rains, it pours, right? allow me to illustrate the out of control-ness that is going on:

- wifey's mom fell and broke her arm this weekend. that means it takes more time and energy for wifey to care for her parents since her mom was able to do some things for herself and she can't now. last night found both of us still going full speed at 2 am and with things left to do on the list and both with killer headaches.

- wifey's business is slowing. the economy sucks and times are tough for little companies. she still puts pressure on herself to bring is as much money as possible, but i wish she wouldn't. as business slows it gives her more time for her parents who are needing her more and more. she has precious little time to work and rarely has more than a few minutes at a time. in my mind, that is perfectly fine since we didn't plan on her having to work when we moved in, but she wants to contribute (her words). i think she works harder than i do. caring for two parents with alzheimer's is MUCH harder than my job. even so, it is a constant struggle for her to balance both since she insists on it.

- on the way home from picking up the meds for wifey's mom (after getting out of the ER at 11 pm), i get pulled over and given two tickets

- my dog (the oldest of the bunch) has been sick to her stomach and not eating much since friday. she just turned 12, so i worry myself sick everytime any little thing goes wrong.

- we had company over the weekend. while their visit was fun, it did make things a bit more hectic than usual. even so, i wish they'd come back already. they are very cool people to be around.

- wifey and i are both having a few health issues right now. none of which are serious in their own right, but they don't help when added to the mix.

- factor in the every day shit (the usual craziness of 2 kids, 5 dogs, and 3 cats) plus the standard money problems (i am seriously underpaid) plus a few things i'm not at liberty to blog about and you've got a runaway freight train.

i keep trying to remind myself... everything happens for a reason... everything happens for a reason... say it with me. everything happens for a reason. that really needs to be my new mantra.

by the way, wifey, when you read this, i want you to know how incredible you are. i'm saying it here so everyone can see it too. i can't tell you how many times i wanted to run up to you, hold you, kiss you and reassure you this weekend. watching you hold your mom's hand in the hospital, watching you talk to the doctors... you looked so beautiful. you are the most amazing person i have ever met and i am so lucky to have you in my life. i know that there is a lot going on right now, but i know that we can get through it together. one thing you don't ever have to worry about is my support. i'm here for any and everything you need. i know that you know that, but i just want to remind you. i know what you are dealing with every day isn't easy. at the end of the day when you need a soft place to land, when you need reassurance, i'm right here.