i'm not dead yet

please forgive me, bloggie peeps. i've been MIA for a bit. for awhile i was blogging on my lunch break just about daily. i was either re-posting old blog entries, writing new ones or tweaking my layout. but... you see... i have been having an affair... with facebook. there are all these cute apps over there, green patches, word games, stickers, quizzes, old friends to be found... but the truth is i miss my blog. for the past week i've been trying to log in and post but... well, you see... i'm addicted to this word game on facebook. and i'm on a mission to at least get close to ben's score. i know i can't beat her, but i'd like to at least get close. anyway, what matters is that i'm here now. :-)

i know you are dying to know what has been up in my world, so here you go: my main concern of late is how stacey is going to get her groove back. please... read on.

sex is a huge priority in my life. but for me, it isn't just about how much of it i'm having. its about the thinking about it, the planning for it... its about putting make up on as i drive home just to make the wife do a double take when i walk in the door. its about doing my nails, getting a pedicure, and all the other girlie things that i like to do. lately, though, life has been so hectic that i haven't had time to do any of it and its starting to get me into a funk of astronomical proportions. i'm just not built to not feel sexy and be ok with that. i didn't realize what it was until recently. i just knew i felt "off". so, i began searching for a way to get myself back to making it a priority. i mentioned in a recent post that i had been reading lesbian blogs lately and one of them (the same one that discusses the gender isses i talked about in that post) often includes erotica and links to other sex related blogs and sites. that prompted me to do more thinking... i toyed with the idea of starting yet another blog and keeping it sex-related, thinking that writing about it would bring it to the forefront of my mind, and thereby help me make it a priority again. in the end, i decided against it. first of all, wifey wasn't comfortable with the intimate details of our sex lives out there for the world to see, even if it was under the veil of anonymity and i respect her opinion. had i so desired, i could have gone against her wishes and done it anyway, but that wasn't the deciding factor. aside from that, i realized that if i did start that second blog, what i was looking for was the attention (as far as comments and readers go), but the attention would be for someone that nobody knew was me. that isn't exactly what i was going for, so i scrapped the whole idea.

while all this was going on, i had to go shopping for new clothes for a business trip i'm going on next month. there was a great sale going on and i wound up getting everything i needed and then some. i found some cute girlie t-shirts for work that show a little cleavage and let the tip of my tattoo peek out the top. since they also fit me better than my other clothes (i have lost over 60 pounds and a lot of my clothes are waaaaay to big now), they show off my curves much more. add to that the fact that i had to get a size smaller pants than my recent "skinny" jeans and i was feeling like a hottie when i left that store! so, step one on my mission to bring the sexy back? so TOTALLY accomplished! and without even realizing it was step one! lol.

now comes a little pampering. i'm dying my hair next week (hopefully) back to my natural color. then there is a little lull in the re-sexifying plans until i am in dallas for my trip. my meetings start on monday, but i am flying in the day before to take my customer service rep to dinner (a little bonding goes a long way in my business). the only flights available get me into dfw at 10:30 in the morning, but i am not going out with the rep until the evening, so i have the whole day to myself. my boss is throwing a little extra spending cash my way to get a hair cut, a pedicure and a manicure. she even sprung for the room with a jacuzzi so that i could go back to the room and have a drink and a soak before dinner. i also have a gift certificate for a massage that i plan on redeeming while i'm there.

wish me luck, my dear bloggie peeps! i need to find that inner sex goddess again!

in other news, wifey's biopsy came back negative (YAY!). i had my second ultrasound and they found ovarian cysts again. i'll be visiting the gyno again very soon. other than that, life is status quo. the mother in law is recovering, the step daughter's belly is growing, the financial trouble is still there.

on that note, i'm outta here! peace, love, and other indoor sports! :-D