the white elephant in the room

i really can't deny it anymore. the state of my mental health, that is. something is up with me, but i can't put my finger on it. i don't know whether to burst into tears or run outside and scream. i feel anxious, sad, tired, worried, stressed. i'm on emotional overload.

added to the mix is the fact that i feel like crap physically. i keep telling myself that its all in my mind. i sat in that dermatologist's office and said i felt fine, now just because something came up on my bloodwork, i can't start feeling bad. its just power of suggestion, i tell myself. but all that coaching isn't working very well. i feel like i've been hit by a truck... tired, achy, dizzy.

anyway, i feel like i'm drowning in all of this, i just had to purge a little.