i'm pretty much a big deal

i work for a movie distribution company. every time i say (or type) that, i heard the gym class heroes in my head - "i'm pretty much a big deal". of course, i'm not, but saying that i'm the director of operations for a movie distrubition company makes people think i am. LOL. anyway, back to my story. i work for a movie distribution company. the owner used to be in the music business in the 70's and he IS pretty much a big deal, both for his fame back then and now for the success of this company. i'm used to that. he was behind the scenes (management, etc) and not a rock star, so i respect his past successes, but i'm not star struck by him.

a few years ago, i found out that one of our sales reps was in an all girl rock band in the 70's and i thought it was pretty cool. she mentioned that the name of the band was fanny, but i'd never heard of them. they were inducted into the hall of fame in her home state a few years ago and she and some of the original band members performed live, which i thought was way cool too. i saw a presentation she put together (slide show set to music) for the performance, but i didn't really think about it any more after that. fast forward to this christmas - for our company holiday party, i did a video slide show presentation with pics of each employee, complete with music, etc. when i took home one of the demos to check it at home, wifey saw pics of the sales rep in question playing drums and asked what the story was, so i told her, "she was in some rock band back in the 70's" and left it at that. wifey, being the nosey woman that she is, kept asking questions. what songs, when, how long was she in the band, why did they break up, etc. so, the other night, i decided to do a little research on this band and answer wifey's questions. well, my friends, i was blown away at what i read. she and her band were most definitely a big deal. here is what david bowie had to say about thema:

"One of the most important female bands in American rock has been buried without a trace. And that is Fanny. They were one of the finest fucking rock bands of their time, in about 1973. They were extraordinary: They wrote everything, they played like motherfuckers, they were just colossal and wonderful, and nobody's ever mentioned them. They're as important as anybody else who's ever been, ever; it just wasn't their time. Revivify Fanny. And I will feel that my work is done."

david freaking bowie! not some unknown person... david freaking bowie! well, needless to say i was impressed, so i continued my google searching. i went to youtube and found a video of them performing on the sonny and cher show. i read tons of stuff about them on various websites, how they were the first all girl rock band ever, how they opened the door for female rockers, etc. i read interviews with them, saw pics. i went to the website (www.fannyrocks.com). i learned all about this whole other side to this person who i've known for over 6 years.

today, my boss brought the box set in for me to listen to. now, after seeing them perform, listening to their music and knowing the way cool person behind it, i'm star struck! seriously! i know a freaking rock star! and not just someone who is a rock star in their own minds, but a real life freaking rock star! someone who has a definite place in rock and roll history.

how fucking cool is that?

happy new year!

i feel like i've been out of the loop for awhile. i haven't been posting or commenting much at all. please don't take it personally my dear bloggie peeps. i still love each and every one of you. ;-) i've just been overwhelmed. but, i think i'm back. at least for a bit.

not much to update on, really. the step-daughter is still pregnant, due in late march. she's had a rough pregnancy, poor thing. the wife and i are still madly in love. i'm still stalled with my weight loss (see my low carb blog).

i don't do resolutions, but i do have a list of things i'd like to do this year:

i'd like to craft more. i'm trying for one project/afghan square a week.
i'd like to have more family time now that my work schedule is a bit different.
i want to start cooking again. i haven't cooked in a bit and i miss it.

i always say that what you are doing new year's eve sets the tone for the coming year and this new year's eve was nice and quiet. we spent it with family. i hope that the coming year is surrounded by family indeed (i know it will be cuz wifey's family is large). however, we had guests, the teen on bedrest and the step son had an early flight to catch, so there was no drinking and subsequent nekkidness for the wife and i. that just won't do. we need to have a re-do for new year's eve now that the step daughter is off of bedrest. wifey, i'm available when you are. :-D

helping a friend out

and hoping to get a little commission out of it too! ;-)

please... click, browse, and by all means, buy something!

remind me never to do that again

some of my faithful readers will remember that i used to blog on modblog, then made the move to efx. well, now that efx is up and running again, i am on a mission to copy over some of my old entries. so i thought why not copy some of the modblog ones too? i went to www.archive.org and looked up my old modblog. i ended up copying one or two entries, but had to close the window because i couldn't stand to read any more of it and my eyes were watering. the modblog days were the days when wifey and i were going through a lot of emotional turmoil. some of my posts were like getting hit in the gut. a lot of what i wrote referenced her entries, so i went and read some of hers too. that was even more painful. i made it all sound so monumental, so HUGE. but reading it now, it sounds like i was mad about something trivial. and by being mad, i upset her when she was going through so much already. i may have been justified back then, but i feel selfish for it now.

so, remind me never to do that again, ok?

she and i have had our fair share of issues and fights. our relationship was full of ups and downs for the first few years. there were all sorts of reasons for it, but we are past that now. looking at it in black and white just made me sad. i don't ever want to go to that place emotionally again. i know back then it was a big deal, but those things don't matter anymore. we've come so far and learned to deal with each other's quirks/issues/general craziness so well that we don't even fight about the things i was blogging about back then. in fact, i think we hardly fight anymore. when we do, its short but intense. it used to be a regular thing, but we've progressed to only once in awhile.

wifey: i love you, honey. you are my world. looking at those entries reminded me of how VERY far we've come. i promise you here and now we are NEVER going back to acting like that. oh god, i can't wait to get home and hug and kiss you.

just babbling

i just wish some people would mind their own business, you know? i'm not going to name names or even scenarios since i think that the people i'm referring to (or their tattle tales... oops! i meant friends) read this blog on occasion. suffice it to say get your nose out of my fucking business! if i wanted your opinion on how i live my life, i would have asked you!



ok! i feel better now!

in other news, in case you haven't clicked on my profile, i've also started a blog about my low carb adventures: http://lowcarbadventures.blogspot.com. i posted a few things over there.

peace, love and hair grease!

ok, so i'm back

efx seems to have died again. even if it is revived, i don't plan to go back. this will be my new blogging home. i will keep my efx account and my new vox account to keep up with old friends, but if i post anything on either blog, it will only be links to posts here.

please forgive me

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2blogs). some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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i'm in a horrible mood today. i don't know why, really, i just am. i'm ready to tell the next person to cross me a thing or two about a thing or two. therefore, i'm sittig quietly at my desk not saying a word. quiet as a mouse i am! :-)

*checks calendar* not pms... maybe its lack of sleep. maybe it is the sum all all stress in my life. maybe its cuz i'm a moody bitch. *giggle*

i'm so cranky that i didn't even post comments on the blogs i just read. i read them, i wanted to say something back, but i'm worried its going to come off as canned, so i figure i'll be quiet. please don't think i ignored you all.

Posted: 3:03 PM, 2/25/2008

i should have taken a left at albequerque

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2blogs). some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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i’ve been thinking a lot lately. about who i am, who i was, who i thought i would be. inside i still feel like the same old me, but the outside doesn’t match anymore. it is partly because of the weight, but there are other things at work here too. part of me thinks that if i lose the weight i’ll be free to be the old me again, but i do know that the weight has nothing to do with it really.

a conversation with an old friend started it (this time), but those of you who have read my blog before know this is a recurring theme. i was a fag hag in high school and just recently reunited with both of my gay boys. :-) so i called one of them the other day and we chatted for a bit. he asked how i was, asked how wifey and the kids were and we proceeded to talk about them for awhile, and i mentioned to him how i never thought i’d find myself where i am now. he agreed and said “you are such a soccer mom!” he said he always thought we’d find each other again in new york in rehab for eating disorders. he said talking to me now is fascinating because it is an entirely different world than the one he lives in. he’s still him but i’m not me anymore. or eat least not the me i was.

then it occurred to me. its one thing for me to say i don’t feel like the same person anymore, but its another thing entirely for someone else to see it. funny thing is he hasn’t actually “seen” me. we found each other again on myspace and have been emailing, texting and sprinkling in the occasional phone call. so this is a conclusion he’s come to just based on our conversations. if he saw me now, he’d probably faint. back then you wouldn’t catch me dead in jeans, 99.9% of my wardrobe was name brand stuff, you’d never catch me with my hair up in a bun, with no make up or looking anything less than what i deemed to be fabulous. today i’m wearing jeans, a t-shirt and crocs (sorry splintered!). i do have make up and have my hair done, but i have definitely left the house without make up on many, many days and without question i’ve thrown my hair in a bun and run out the door rather than spend time primping.

i’m wondering… have i changed so much or have i just shifted my focus? i lean toward the shifting focus answer to that question, but that leads me to various others. if i’ve shifted focus, what have i shifted it to? am i neglecting myself and things i like and/or want? will that have ramifications? should i make an effort to stop it or just let it go given the fact that i’m happiest making other people happy?

i used to be travelling the road to ... well, i don't know where, but it went somewhere, i'm sure. however, i think i missed my turn. the thing is, i like the place i wound up (wifey, kids, dogs, etc). so is being different really so bad? i mean we all change, right?

Posted: 2:15 PM, 2/20/2008

lonely... i'm so lonely

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2blogs). some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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i finished editing my erotic story, but i don't know if i want to post it given the lack of interest lately. it seems i used to get more comments before. am i the only one who feels like the commeting/blogging has dropped off a bit? don't you people know i'm an attention whore and i need as many comments as possible? :-D

maybe i need to sex it up a little in here? or send out groupie applications? or maybe just post/comment more. i don't know, but i miss the old efx2 days.

Posted: 7:20 PM, 1/28/2008

revenge is so sweet!

i don't know if i've mentioned it before, but the company i work for is a small operation. there are about 15 employees between both companies my boss owns. needless to say, it is a very family sort of environment. we all get along, for the most part. that is, until recently. enter upon the scene the newest addition to the family: ms. colombia. now, let me say i have nothing against colombians at all. however, this one in particular used to get under my skin on a regular basis when she first started here. the receptionist we had at the time fared worse than i with her. it was a constant issue with the two of them. the receptionist and i were rather close and i think i got caught in the crossfire a lot. she gets under my skin MUCH less now that the receptionist is gone. either that or i have just gotten used to her. regardless of why, it is in my best interest to get along with her as she is VERY close to both of my bosses. i know what side my bread is buttered on. of course all the customers think she is a hottie. she has the latin accent when she speaks english and plays the poor innocent little spanish girl with batting eyelashes rather well. she does the cutesy thing well too, running around calling people "sweetie potato pan cake" with a thick spanish accent. the guys melt every time. trust me, papito, that aint what its all about.

at any rate, the story goes like this: she comes on board, all sorts of clashes begin between her and the receptionist, lots of sarcastic little comments to me, silent treatment, dirty looks, etc.

fast forward to the company party for july 4th. i had shoulder length hair at the time and my boss had scheduled a spa day for my birthday which was around the corner. we were all talking about what was planned for my hair and she, of course, was giving her advice. she is the office expert on all things cosmetic. *sarcastic smile* i was telling her how long my hair was before (which i didn't think she knew) and she said she remembered. i asked her "did i have long hair when i met you?" and she replied "yes, i met you when you were ugly and had long hair." of course, my jaw dropped. i raised an eyebrow and asked her "did you just call me ugly?" according to her, she didn't. she claims to have meant that she finds long hair ugly and that it was a language malfunction.

i said all that to say this: fast forward to today. i'll give you three guesses as to who was asking me for diet advice and the first two don't count. *doing the nanny nanny boo boo dance* she wants to drop a few pounds before some christmas party she has to go to with her man and came to ME to ask how to go about it. maybe after she does it, i can tell her "i met you when you were ugly and fat" and then claim to have meant something else.

but like i said, she and i are getting along now and i'm over her past rudenesses (don't you just love when i make up words?) so of course i won't be doing anything like that ... pregnant pause ... well, maybe.


Posted: 3:19 PM, 11/29/2007

stuff and things

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2blogs). some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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well, i'm still alive. the reason for my lack of blogging of late? umm..... not sure really.

the only news going on in spacey/green world is that i went to the doc, who decided she wanted me to go back on the diet pill i was taking before but needed to do the standard ekg before since it had been so long since i'd been on it. thank goodness she did cuz what did we find? an arrhythmia! so off to the cardiologist i go and the ekg there confirms what my primary doc found. so tomorrow is the echocardiogram, next friday is the stress test and then a monitor for 24 hours. meanwhile, wifey came down with bronchitis. she is doing better now, but she was a pretty sick woman.

work is work. home is good. finances suck ASS. i'm still trying to get this blog to look like i want it to. i made a little progress, but i'm not done yet. i still don't get how i can design websites and not be able to get this together. how do i get the "i'm not crazy, i'm just a little unwell" to not show up on my header? i'm sure its simple, but i can't make it go away without my blog showing as untitled.

so what have you people been up to? i've only been able to catch up on a few blogs cuz i am not comfortable around here yet. talk to me, ppl!

Posted: 2:41 PM, 10/11/2007

what's your fantasy?

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2 which then became efx2blogs). in the end, the final incarnation (efx2blogs) went down one too many times for me, so i switched to blogger. i was able to recover most of my older stuff (efx2) from archive.org. some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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for those of you that have read blogs about discussions we have on the job, you will remember that we discuss a WIDE variety of things. the owner of the company and i once discussed double-ended dildos (he'd never seen one and had a different idea of what they looked like), the IT guy and i regularly discuss theories in physics, etc. the most recent discussion the IT guy and i had involved fantasies and the people we fantasize about. i was saying that someone (the person in discussion at that moment) wasn't in my "fantasy land" because of their personality and he said that in fantasy land, people can have a personality transplant because fantasy land means it can be whatever you want. i then told him that the only person that lives in my fantasy land is wifey, to which he declared me abnormal. this then sparked a discussion with the rest of the office and i began taking a poll of those people who would actually answer and not be offended. so far, the score is 2 to 4. wifey and i say the only ones in our fantasy is each other and the other 4 (IT guy, the receptionist, the owner's wife and accounts payable) all say that other people aside from their significant others live in fantasy land. i do have to say that if i were single, there would be more people in fantasy land, but there is not a single fantasy in my head that i wouldn't want to explore with wifey. the receptionist agreed on that point. she said that if she were single, it wouldn't just be fantasy land, it would be fantasy city it would be so full (with both permanent residents and renters). the owner's wife said that she didn't think it was abnormal in a bad way that only wifey lives in my fantasy land. she thinks wifey is extremely lucky. and i think i'm lucky too.

so, in light of all this, i'd like to extend the discussion to you guys. who lives in your fantasy land? does the fact that most people seem to have fantasies about other people mean they are cheating in their minds?

lookout weekend cuz here i come!

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2 which then became efx2blogs). in the end, the final incarnation (efx2blogs) went down one too many times for me, so i switched to blogger. i was able to recover most of my older stuff (efx2) from archive.org. some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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i'm plotting and planning my weekend activities. here's a clue for wifey:

I'm a sexy mama (mama)
Who knows just how to get what I wanna (wanna)
What I want to do is spring this on you (on you)
Back up all of the things that I told you (told you)

You've been saying all the right things all night long
But I can't seem to get you over here to help take this off
Baby, can't you see? (see)
How these clothes are fitting on me (me)
And the heat coming from this beat (beat)
I'm about to blow
I don't think you know



and on that note, the song i was listening to (ministry - jesus built my hotrod) is over, so i'm outta here!

i am not in high school anymore

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2 which then became efx2blogs). in the end, the final incarnation (efx2blogs) went down one too many times for me, so i switched to blogger. i was able to recover most of my older stuff (efx2) from archive.org. some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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that's right toto, we aren't in kansas anymore. yeah, yeah, i know. i'm in my thirties. i haven't been in high school for a long time. so what am i saying, you ask. well, it all began with freaking myspace.

i was looking for a dear old friend of mine and then it occurred to me that maybe there were other old high school friends i could find as well, so i dragged my senior yearbook and various signature books out to find last names, etc. and what do i find but all these well wishes from people gushing how close we were, how much i listened to their problems, etc etc etc. and i don't mean just the casual hey, it was nice having you in algebra this year kind of friends. my friendship meant something to these people, apparently. so whats my problem? i don't remember 99% of them! and of those i do remember, there are references to all sorts of shit that i can't recall either. "don't forget! bonded sisters!" wtf? i mean i know most people say things like 'to a great friend" or whatever when they sign those things at the end of the year, but these went beyond the regular stuff and i have no idea who they were or why i was "bonded with them" i also had a list of memorable quotes, which also only rang vague bells. that didn't bother me nearly as much, however.

of the 8 people i would really love to talk to again, only 2 have a myspace, which made me think of all the years of wasted time. time i could have spent keeping in touch with my friends but didn't because i was too busy running from myself. i spent years getting myself into messes, trying to numb myself, etc and ended up running from my own past and planting myself here in florida. enough time has past now and i am craving a connection with my past. i don't want to talk to all the old friends, thats for sure, but a select few who knew me back then would do my heart good. i have wifey and her family and a few friends here in miami, but the total lack of any connection to my life before florida is a little isolating sometimes.

aside from the 2 old friends i found, i also found one of my ex's. it was a bit of a shock, i have to admit, to see her smiling and looking happy considering the condition i left her in. i had to remind myself that almost 14 years have passed. things change. our relationship was a trainwreck. distastrous with a capital d. yet, i find myself almost irresistibly tempted to say hi to her. not out of some desire to reconnect with an old flame (god no. i'm too madly in love with that sexy cuban of mine), and not for any other reason other than saying hey, how the fuck are ya? i think wifey is threatened by the prospect and i dont' want the ex to think i've been carrying a torch for her all this time, so i haven't done it yet.

fucking myspace! now i see why i waited so long to get one!

confession

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2 which then became efx2blogs). in the end, the final incarnation (efx2blogs) went down one too many times for me, so i switched to blogger. i was able to recover most of my older stuff (efx2) from archive.org. some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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forgive me fellow bloggers for i have sinned. as a result of recent events (ie, trying to stay in touch with my friend in california) i now have a my space and i actually like it! *hangs head in shame* i even have a cute little pink and black punky/femme layout with music and pictures. i teased my step daughter and my ex-coworker about my space every chance i got. i told them i didn't see the point of my space so many times. i didn't realize how fun it would be to find old friends, classmates, etc.

don't despair, however, i am not leaving efx for myspace. i might be out of the closet but i am married to someone who isn't and wifey's family all use my space, so i will still blog here. i can't blog openly over there about my REAL life. i won't be placing links on my blog to my my space or vice versa either. i just felt the need to confess my sins.

whatever

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2 which then became efx2blogs). in the end, the final incarnation (efx2blogs) went down one too many times for me, so i switched to blogger. i was able to recover most of my older stuff (efx2) from archive.org. some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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seeing as how i'm almost at the 4 month mark of my dieting adventure, i thought i'd post an update:
i'm down 34 pounds.


while i am happy about that, i'm in such a mood today (have been for several days) that i'm not really doing the little cheery thing that smilie above is doing. i've been in mood for awhile actually (since january) with certain aspects of my life. seeing as how some people who are involved in those aspects of my life read this blog, i'll leave the details out (how does that sound for some secret agent bullshit? lol)

of late, i have:
been treated like a brainless idiot more than once
had my authority underminded
been told a solution i proposed to a problem was "stupid"
been caught in the middle of warfare for speaking my mind
been on the receiving end of unwarranted silence
wanted to throw my computer at my boss

i'd like to direct a little something to those people who have done these things:

enough is enough!

thank god i have wifey to go home to, otherwise i think i'd lose what is left of my mind. we had an "issue" recently, but it lasted much less than previous fights, so i was VERY happy about that.

finally

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2 which then became efx2blogs). in the end, the final incarnation (efx2blogs) went down one too many times for me, so i switched to blogger. i was able to recover most of my older stuff (efx2) from archive.org. some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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i figured it was time to actually post something instead of a meme or a quiz, so here i am, still with lots to say and nothing at all at the same time. i wish i had time to do a dirty thirty, but i am at work right now and while i have half an hour left on my lunch break, i'm sure i'll get interrupted too many times. so, i figure i'll just ramble for a bit.

it has come to my attention (after discovering careless errors at work) that i am FRIED and in much need of some time to decompress and disconnect. to that end, i have a few things in mind:

i am hoping to be able to go on a women only spiritual camping trip soon. there are going to be all kinds of activities, all sorts of new things to learn, etc.

shortly thereafter, wifey and i are going to have an in-town getaway. going out of town (even though i had an offer to have hotel paid for) is just not feasible. wifey's business is new and she needs to be able to do SOME work every day just to keep up and keep those customers happy. plus, we have 4 dogs and a cat. the cost to board them alone is prohibitive. so we have decided to take a long weekend where she will work the minimum possible and we have no other plans than to be together. we desperatley need it. as my boss so eloquently put it, we need to take a weekend to suck and fuck to our heart's content. lol. while that may be true, we also need some couple time. i need to feel like more than a dishwasher, dog feeder, child picker upper and wifey needs to feel like more than a taxi driver and complaint department. and she really needs some time away from the computer. i think her mouse has indentations where her fingers go. i can think of much more fun things to do with those fingers.

before that, however (this coming weekend) i plan to spend at least one night (two if i'm lucky) heavily under the influence. i tried to do that this weekend, but it didn't work out.

i have been feeling rather strongly that i need to do something with my life lately. i've been feeling....... stagnant. i considered taking classes at the local community college, but it will take too long to get the degree i was interested in. seeing as how its not a requirement to do this thing i'm interested in (which is staying under wraps for awhile, hence the general references to this "thing"), i'm teaching myself. so far things are going well. the next task is to get my new computer up to speed so that i can do online tutorials and such. that is going to involve removing memory, a hard drive and cd-rom from the old computer and putting it all in the new one. while that may sound easy to some, i have never done any of those things. i'm concerned, but looking forward to the opportunity to learn such things.

for those of you who know what the moyo files, are, we have a new addition. wifey was going through her mp3s this weekend (some of which were downloaded by her godson) and she asked me if i like daddy yankee. but of course moyo yoyo over there asked me if like "doddy jankee" of course, i lost it. god i love that woman.

in un-related news, i took a few quizzes over at quizfarm and found out that:

i am a goddess
You scored as Goddess. You are a goddess. Your constantly helping people with their problems, but you never take time for you. You should try to take some alone time. Take a trip far away, where noone knows you. It will be good for you, because you deserve a break.
What ancient breed are you?
created with QuizFarm.com<

my kinky turn on is bondage:
You scored as Bondage. Your turn on is bondage... all out. You don't have a specific part of kinky sex that turns you on more than any other... everything working together turns you on. And why shouldn't it? Sex isn't sex without all the trimmings.
What's Your Kinky Turn On?
created with QuizFarm.com

i'm a slave to bdsm:
You scored as A Slave To BDSM. Admit it, you like being tied up and being told you've been very naughty. You like teasing your partner and making them squirm, and not letting them be able to do anything about it. Some people think what you do is sick and disgusting, but you know it's all in good fun.
How are you in bed
created with QuizFarm.com

and i'm a "surprise" dyke:
You scored as The Surprise! Dyke. Despite the dead giveaways, such as the tattoos and love of the L Word, people still seem to think that you're straight.
What Type of Lesbian Are You? (Inspired by Curve Mag.)
created with QuizFarm.com

did ya miss me?

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2 which then became efx2blogs). in the end, the final incarnation (efx2blogs) went down one too many times for me, so i switched to blogger. i was able to recover most of my older stuff (efx2) from archive.org. some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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so did you guys miss me at all? (here is where you insert a yes. there is no other answer cuz i know you were all missing me so much you couldn't stand it.)

so yeah. merry christmas, happy new year, happy hanukkah and all that jazz. i hope you all had a happy holiday. i got to see my mom for christmas. even if there was an issue on christmas eve, it was still great to spend time with her. we had a party at the house on new year's eve, which was also nice. we all had too much too drink and we all had a great time. i've heard that what you do on new year's eve is what you will be doing all year long. trust me, we rang it in right.

i don't really know why i haven't blogged lately. i guess its been a combination of a lack of time and lack of mojo (or moyo for my faithful readers). life in the spacey/green household has been a busy lately and happier than ever. wifey and i have been so sappy we've even said "we really need to get a room"

i do have to say, though, that she said something to me that made me quite sad the other day. no, it wasn't a fight or anything. it was just an observation that made me want to hold her and never let go. as a result of recent events and comments made to both of us, she said that she was tired of feeling like she had to prove herself to my family and friends. that broke my heart. the fact that someone as good and loving as wifey would feel that way saddens me. her family accepted me even when they thought i was only a "friend" and they really opened their hearts when they found out the truth. wifey hasn't been so lucky with my family and friends. my grandparents have come a long way and accept her now, but it was a rough road. she and my mom had their issues in the past as well, which have been worked out. we both kind of felt like my mom acted a bit different over the christmas holiday, but it could also have just been sensitive feelings over the drama on christmas eve. differing perceptions aside, i've learned that people don't always take the good with the bad when i tell the whole story and assume the worst when i leave out the nasty details. it frustrates me for me and for wifey. for me because i feel like i either can't say a damn thing or i need to over explain so that people don't think that whatever shitty thing is going on in my life is because of her. for her because she doesn't deserve anything but love and acceptance. she is truly the most beautiful human being i've ever known. truth be told, we've been through some shit. but we've been through it together. some of it i put her through, some she put me through and some we were put through as a couple and decided on the best path together. yes she makes me think i'm insane when we fight, but guess what, i'm rude as fuck when we fight too. shit happens. the bottom line is this woman makes me feel things i never thought possible. she makes me smile, laugh and cry from sheer happiness. it makes me crazy that the whole world can't see that.

i have to post a bit of a side note at this point. wifey just asked me what i was writing about and i said "you because you made me sad" to which she replied "you wouldn't post that without telling me first" (after asking me when, of course). when asked why, she said cuz i knew i'd get a spanking for doing something like that (its a deal we have. i'll never blog something she hasn't heard from me first). my answer was of course that i was telling the whole blog world that she was mean to me and called me names (so i can get the spanking, of course). so help me out people, tell her all the horrible stuff i told you guys about her while she wasn't looking so i can cash in!



bring it on, baby!

my absence

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2 which then became efx2blogs). in the end, the final incarnation (efx2blogs) went down one too many times for me, so i switched to blogger. i was able to recover most of my older stuff (efx2) from archive.org. some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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i've been trying to answer the two remaining questions from the ask me anything post, but i've had so much on my mind lately that i can't focus. i haven't even felt like blogging that much. i've got some health issues going on that have me tripping out pretty hard core. i've been explaining it to the people that ask as "girl stuff" and that pretty much does it for them as far as an explanation. basically i had a test done, they found something and i have to go for a biopsy on thursday. so aside from being in quite a bit of pain, i get to go in for more. nice. wifey is doing her best to reassure me and she is being so supportive. i love that woman.

anyway, those of you that asked me stuff, i will be answering them as soon as i get my head sorted out.

I'm feeling: worried

questions and answers... part 2

this is a copy of an old post from my old blog (efx2 which then became efx2blogs). in the end, the final incarnation (efx2blogs) went down one too many times for me, so i switched to blogger. i was able to recover most of my older stuff (efx2) from archive.org. some smilies, graphics, and/or links may be missing, but you get the idea.

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here are my answers to suniath's questions
top 5 sex toys
wifey
the cuffs
and............... *rummaging through toy collection*
the purple one w/a bunny on it (i think)
the pink multiple choice one
the sparkly one


chilli or chives?
depends on the food. on hot dogs, chili, on potatoes, chives.

to shave or not to shave?
not to shave. to trim. unless is legs and underarms we are talking about, then its to shave, definitely.

red couch or black cat?
red couch (no idea if there is hidden symbolism there, but i know like red couches)

can homotourists and homoterrorists live in peace with homos?
absolutely cuz isn't a homoterrorist just a terrorist who is a homo?

why doesnt someone make a strapon with straps that actually stay on?
from your lips to the toy maker's ears, hon. maybe i should design my own.

*bow*


I'm feeling: rushed